I love days like this.
The cold wind blows against my face
Lifts my hair and carries my worries away
As I walk, the cold air brings a sense of reality
Shows me the truth, revealing it gently
I love days like this.
The sun peaks from behind a cloud
Showing it's light; heat hidden by the wind
Days like this bring hope
Show me the fiction of my concerns
I run.
All my troubles fall away
Fall frozen in time and wind
Warmth within the cold
I love days like this.
Monday, February 28, 2011
Sunday, January 30, 2011
Rabbie's Lassies
Last night I went to my local legion to celebrate Robbie Burns Day. For those who don't know, and I hope there are not many of you, Robbie Burns is a Scottish poet and folk hero. As part of my youthful highland dance classes, every Robbie Burns day of my childhood was spent dancing in retirement homes to celebrate and avoiding trying to eat the haggis; a dish, which, in hindsight, I actually quite enjoy.
Despite having grown up with such an attachment and appreciation to Robbie Burns, I really didn't know much about him...until yesterday that is. As part of the festivities one of the speakers went up to the podium and told us about Robbie's love of the ladies. I had heard rumours of him being quite the heartbreaker, so it wasn't the extent of his infidelity and scandal that shocked me. After the initial tales of love and lust, the speaker went on to state that Robbie didn't love ALL the ladies in his life and proceeded to recite the following poem about his friend's wife.
Willie Wastle dwalt on Tweed,
The spot they ca'd it Linkumdoddie.
Willie was a wabster guid
Could stown a clue wi onie body.
He had a wife was dour and din,
O, Tinkler Maidgie was her mither!
Sic a wife as Willie had,
I wad na gie a button for her.
She has an e'e (she has but ane),
The cat has twa the very colour,
Five rusty teeth, forbye a stump,
A clapper-toungue wad deave a miller;
A whiskin beard about her mou,
Her nose and chin they threaten ither:
Sic a wife as Willie had,
I wad na gie a button for her.
She's bow-hough'd, she's hem-shin'd,
Ae limpin leg a hand-breed shorter;
She's twisted right, she's twisted left,
To balance fair in ilka quarter;
She has a hump upon her breast,
The twin o that upon her shouther:
Sic a wife as Willie had,
I wad na gie a button for her.
Auld baudrans by the ingle sits,
An wi her loof her face a-washin;
But Willie's wife is nae sae trig,
She dights her frunzie wi a hushion;
Her walie nieves like midden-creels,
Her face wad fyle the Logan Water:
Sic a wife as Willie had,
I wad na gie a button for her.
Isn't that terrible! What a horrible thing to say about someone! I mean...fine! You don't like the woman. It's one thing to tell your friend that you don't like his wife. It's mamouthly more horrible to become a famous, world reknowned poet and write a long poem about all the characteristics and physical attributes of her being that disgust you!
The worst thing about this is that I still like Robbie Burns. I will continue to attend the annual events where I get to eat haggis, sing loudly, and dance to fiddle music. After all, people are human and I wouldn't want my admirers to change their opinion of me based on angry poems I wrote when I was having a bad day. And I can't know that this wasn't the case.
Despite having grown up with such an attachment and appreciation to Robbie Burns, I really didn't know much about him...until yesterday that is. As part of the festivities one of the speakers went up to the podium and told us about Robbie's love of the ladies. I had heard rumours of him being quite the heartbreaker, so it wasn't the extent of his infidelity and scandal that shocked me. After the initial tales of love and lust, the speaker went on to state that Robbie didn't love ALL the ladies in his life and proceeded to recite the following poem about his friend's wife.
Willie Wastle dwalt on Tweed,
The spot they ca'd it Linkumdoddie.
Willie was a wabster guid
Could stown a clue wi onie body.
He had a wife was dour and din,
O, Tinkler Maidgie was her mither!
Sic a wife as Willie had,
I wad na gie a button for her.
She has an e'e (she has but ane),
The cat has twa the very colour,
Five rusty teeth, forbye a stump,
A clapper-toungue wad deave a miller;
A whiskin beard about her mou,
Her nose and chin they threaten ither:
Sic a wife as Willie had,
I wad na gie a button for her.
She's bow-hough'd, she's hem-shin'd,
Ae limpin leg a hand-breed shorter;
She's twisted right, she's twisted left,
To balance fair in ilka quarter;
She has a hump upon her breast,
The twin o that upon her shouther:
Sic a wife as Willie had,
I wad na gie a button for her.
Auld baudrans by the ingle sits,
An wi her loof her face a-washin;
But Willie's wife is nae sae trig,
She dights her frunzie wi a hushion;
Her walie nieves like midden-creels,
Her face wad fyle the Logan Water:
Sic a wife as Willie had,
I wad na gie a button for her.
Isn't that terrible! What a horrible thing to say about someone! I mean...fine! You don't like the woman. It's one thing to tell your friend that you don't like his wife. It's mamouthly more horrible to become a famous, world reknowned poet and write a long poem about all the characteristics and physical attributes of her being that disgust you!
The worst thing about this is that I still like Robbie Burns. I will continue to attend the annual events where I get to eat haggis, sing loudly, and dance to fiddle music. After all, people are human and I wouldn't want my admirers to change their opinion of me based on angry poems I wrote when I was having a bad day. And I can't know that this wasn't the case.
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Éireannach
That's right! Is Éireannach mé! My Irish passport has come in the mail and it's all confetti and balloons style official. They've accepted me as one of them for Heaven only knows what reason. Obviously, they thought only of my father's birth place and not of my strong Canadian patriotism. To be perfectly fair, I feel a good deal of Irish patriotism as well. I think I just like being patriotic. It's kind of my thing :-)
I do feel a little guilty about getting the passport. It's almost as though I don't really deserve to be accepted into a culture I haven't really been a part of. I've always been drawn to my Irish half, but really...what do I know about it? I don't speak Irish Gaelic beyond "Slainte!", I've never lived in Ireland, and I have no idea of the political system or pop culture. It doesn't seem fair to award someone with citizenship who doesn't have a real understanding of your culture. Then again, I suppose it happens very frequently in Canada and other countries around the world. It's just a hypocritical aspect of my personality, to hold myself to a higher standard than I do others. I'm disappointed in myself about applying for citizenship to a country I feel inadequately a part of, but I would welcome others to Canada if they were in my shoes.
I guess I'll just have to take solace in the fact that one of my favourite authors is Irish.
I do feel a little guilty about getting the passport. It's almost as though I don't really deserve to be accepted into a culture I haven't really been a part of. I've always been drawn to my Irish half, but really...what do I know about it? I don't speak Irish Gaelic beyond "Slainte!", I've never lived in Ireland, and I have no idea of the political system or pop culture. It doesn't seem fair to award someone with citizenship who doesn't have a real understanding of your culture. Then again, I suppose it happens very frequently in Canada and other countries around the world. It's just a hypocritical aspect of my personality, to hold myself to a higher standard than I do others. I'm disappointed in myself about applying for citizenship to a country I feel inadequately a part of, but I would welcome others to Canada if they were in my shoes.
I guess I'll just have to take solace in the fact that one of my favourite authors is Irish.
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
The Qi of Tai Chi
Everyday on my way to work in South Africa, I would pass by a group of people practicing tai chi. While most of the students in my complex were fast asleep attempting to relieve their hangovers and life's stresses, five of them stood on the grass at an ungodly hour to do exactly the same thing only much more effectively. Each time I walked past I had the urge to join them. The only things holding me back were a reluctance to interupt their peace of mind, a fear that by just jumping in I would offend more than show my interest in the art, and an obligation of punctuality for my work.
I've never been drawn to martial arts, but tai chi felt different. Up until Monday I had never tried it, but whenever I have been stressed or tired in the last year I would practice fake tai chi moves of my own invention. It would always calm me down and make me feel more relaxed. So I was really excited to see what tai chi was actually like and not my made up interpretation of it.
To be perfectly honest, I'm not sure if it's the exercise for me. I think I'm going to have the same issue with it that I have with yoga. It's too slow. I like the meditation aspect of it and what little of the history we've been taught so far is really interesting, but there's something about the slow movement that makes me feel restless and agitated. I have come to realize that silence and calm are truely skills to be mastered. It's strange how the ability to not think has become a practiced art over time. That our society is so charged and restless as to need to practice just being. I think that's why I'm drawn to tai chi in principle and why I hope it will capture my interest in practice. I want to be able to purposefully be just present with myself and I think I've wanted this my whole life. When I was 13 I started learning about and playing with wicca. Part of it was because it was unknown and kind of forbidden...what 13 year old isn't drawn to that, but the part that I really enjoyed doing wasn't making love potions, it was the grounding and centering you do before any wicca practice. Just visualizing that you are part of a complex natural ecosystem and connected to everything that is around you. It is very calming and revitalizing. The sad thing is that I feel, as I'm sure many others do, that I no longer have time to take a moment to just be in the moment. Even worse than that, I can't think of what I do that is more important than that...
I've never been drawn to martial arts, but tai chi felt different. Up until Monday I had never tried it, but whenever I have been stressed or tired in the last year I would practice fake tai chi moves of my own invention. It would always calm me down and make me feel more relaxed. So I was really excited to see what tai chi was actually like and not my made up interpretation of it.
To be perfectly honest, I'm not sure if it's the exercise for me. I think I'm going to have the same issue with it that I have with yoga. It's too slow. I like the meditation aspect of it and what little of the history we've been taught so far is really interesting, but there's something about the slow movement that makes me feel restless and agitated. I have come to realize that silence and calm are truely skills to be mastered. It's strange how the ability to not think has become a practiced art over time. That our society is so charged and restless as to need to practice just being. I think that's why I'm drawn to tai chi in principle and why I hope it will capture my interest in practice. I want to be able to purposefully be just present with myself and I think I've wanted this my whole life. When I was 13 I started learning about and playing with wicca. Part of it was because it was unknown and kind of forbidden...what 13 year old isn't drawn to that, but the part that I really enjoyed doing wasn't making love potions, it was the grounding and centering you do before any wicca practice. Just visualizing that you are part of a complex natural ecosystem and connected to everything that is around you. It is very calming and revitalizing. The sad thing is that I feel, as I'm sure many others do, that I no longer have time to take a moment to just be in the moment. Even worse than that, I can't think of what I do that is more important than that...
Thursday, January 6, 2011
Things to do before I turn 24
I would like to sit here and say that I have been so busy since I returned from Ireland that I haven't been able to write, but to be perfectly honest I haven't been busy. I've been kind of depressed. Up until I went to Ireland I had the goal of training for and planning that trip. Now I just have the goal of finding a job. A very intimidation and vague goal. If there's one thing I've learned from years of goal making and planning classes throughout my schooling, it's that vague and intimidating are exactly what you don't want in a goal. This, I believe, is what lead to my depression and inability to make that goal a reality.
Now, if there's one thing that rather arbitrary milestones, such as the new year that we are entering into, are good for, it is reassessing your goals and where you are in your life. I've come to the conclusion that my vague goals and less than sunny disposition are doing me no favours. So, I've broken down my goal into more manageable steps and added a few fun goals for this year. After finding an unfinished list of things I was supposed to do before I turned 18, I've decided to consolidate a list of things I want to do before I turn 24...
- Hike the West Coast Trail
- Volunteer with the Girl Guides and become more engaging when teaching kids
- Take Tai Chi classes
- Make the plans for and build a hovercraft big enough for me to ride in
- Sew a summer dress
- Learn how to make a kayak and start making plans for doing so
- Grow a herb garden
- Read two fun books a month
- Take up Geocaching
- Improve my French
and the kicker...
- Find a job that I'm excited to go to everyday (volunteer somewhere conservation related in the mean time)
It's an intimidating list, but I'm really excited to do everything on it. I have spent so much time these past three months working at a job where I love the people, but it doesn't bring out a passion in me. It's time to decide what I want to do with my life and actually do it.
I keep thinking that because I am not on an adventure like I was in Ireland and South Africa, I have nothing to write about here. Hopefully having these goals will convince me that I can have adventures at home, too. I'm starting Tai Chi classes on Monday and haven't been more excited about it. Girl Guides is going well, too. We've actually started planning our meetings, so I feel more involved in that. I have intimidatingly signed myself up to lead the girls in fulfilling a bunch of their program requirements. I have no idea how well this is going to go, but I'm jumping in with both feet and crossing my fingers that I'll learn quickly this way. I think I need to just find my own teaching niche and become confident in my ability to do that. So, wish me luck! I'll let you know how the Tai Chi and my first time leading the girls through a program requirement go. I'm also going geocaching for the first time on Saturday, so I'll have to tell you how I like that, too!
Happy New Year and I hope you all have your own adventures in 2011!
Now, if there's one thing that rather arbitrary milestones, such as the new year that we are entering into, are good for, it is reassessing your goals and where you are in your life. I've come to the conclusion that my vague goals and less than sunny disposition are doing me no favours. So, I've broken down my goal into more manageable steps and added a few fun goals for this year. After finding an unfinished list of things I was supposed to do before I turned 18, I've decided to consolidate a list of things I want to do before I turn 24...
- Hike the West Coast Trail
- Volunteer with the Girl Guides and become more engaging when teaching kids
- Take Tai Chi classes
- Make the plans for and build a hovercraft big enough for me to ride in
- Sew a summer dress
- Learn how to make a kayak and start making plans for doing so
- Grow a herb garden
- Read two fun books a month
- Take up Geocaching
- Improve my French
and the kicker...
- Find a job that I'm excited to go to everyday (volunteer somewhere conservation related in the mean time)
It's an intimidating list, but I'm really excited to do everything on it. I have spent so much time these past three months working at a job where I love the people, but it doesn't bring out a passion in me. It's time to decide what I want to do with my life and actually do it.
I keep thinking that because I am not on an adventure like I was in Ireland and South Africa, I have nothing to write about here. Hopefully having these goals will convince me that I can have adventures at home, too. I'm starting Tai Chi classes on Monday and haven't been more excited about it. Girl Guides is going well, too. We've actually started planning our meetings, so I feel more involved in that. I have intimidatingly signed myself up to lead the girls in fulfilling a bunch of their program requirements. I have no idea how well this is going to go, but I'm jumping in with both feet and crossing my fingers that I'll learn quickly this way. I think I need to just find my own teaching niche and become confident in my ability to do that. So, wish me luck! I'll let you know how the Tai Chi and my first time leading the girls through a program requirement go. I'm also going geocaching for the first time on Saturday, so I'll have to tell you how I like that, too!
Happy New Year and I hope you all have your own adventures in 2011!
Saturday, October 23, 2010
Alumna
I considered not writing in my blog for a couple weeks solely for the ironic contrast to my last post, but I don't think my love of irony is enough to make me want to take a hiatus from writing in here. So here I am :-)
I went in to my old university yesterday to get my Alumni Card. It was the first time it really hit me that I have graduated and no longer have a purpose when I come to the university campus. Despite feeling a little lost, I was excited to get my Alumni Card. It was a neat next step in my life and the whole bus ride I was looking forward seeing the Card for the first time.
I sat there in the office waiting in anticipation. What would the card look like? Would they take my picture for it? Would it have a neat holographic security device? Could I use it to get into clubs? High security government buildings? Speakeasies!
The secretary turns around. I can see that she has the card. It's in her hand. Partially hidden by her sleave. Oh why won't she move her sleave! She walks towards me. Smiles and hands over...the card.
I'm speachless...
It's...just...so...
...ordinary. It's honestly nothing special at all. The world didn't change. There were no trumpets. No falling confetti. Not even my picture is on it. For goodness sake, I have to write my own name on it! This isn't how an alumna should be treated! Forced to use her own hand to validate such a prestigious card! Outrageous!
I'm just about to say something. Voice my indignation. Then she hands me a piece of paper. A list. A list of all the discounts I will get. The anger subsides and I am flooded with all the memories of free things given to student. Oh those were the days! What a stupid card to make me no longer eligible for such fantastic free things, like highlighters and fridge magnets! Now I have to settle for 5% off at hotels I can't afford to stay in anyway. All of a sudden a Masters is looking like pretty good idea...
I went in to my old university yesterday to get my Alumni Card. It was the first time it really hit me that I have graduated and no longer have a purpose when I come to the university campus. Despite feeling a little lost, I was excited to get my Alumni Card. It was a neat next step in my life and the whole bus ride I was looking forward seeing the Card for the first time.
I sat there in the office waiting in anticipation. What would the card look like? Would they take my picture for it? Would it have a neat holographic security device? Could I use it to get into clubs? High security government buildings? Speakeasies!
The secretary turns around. I can see that she has the card. It's in her hand. Partially hidden by her sleave. Oh why won't she move her sleave! She walks towards me. Smiles and hands over...the card.
I'm speachless...
It's...just...so...
...ordinary. It's honestly nothing special at all. The world didn't change. There were no trumpets. No falling confetti. Not even my picture is on it. For goodness sake, I have to write my own name on it! This isn't how an alumna should be treated! Forced to use her own hand to validate such a prestigious card! Outrageous!
I'm just about to say something. Voice my indignation. Then she hands me a piece of paper. A list. A list of all the discounts I will get. The anger subsides and I am flooded with all the memories of free things given to student. Oh those were the days! What a stupid card to make me no longer eligible for such fantastic free things, like highlighters and fridge magnets! Now I have to settle for 5% off at hotels I can't afford to stay in anyway. All of a sudden a Masters is looking like pretty good idea...
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Priorities
Hello. I've come to the conclusion that people don't do enough of what they like in life. To a certain extent this can't be helped because unpleasant things like washing dishes and cleaning yourself have to be done in order to function in the presence of others, but I've decided to spend more time doing things that I really love. A perfect example of this for me is hiking. I absolutely love hiking and whenever I'm out in the forest or at the top of a big hill I can't help but smile. However, I so rarely spend time doing this activity that makes me smile. It's amazing how weeks can go by and you are so distracted by the things you feel you must do that the things you actually want to do and enjoy get pushed to the wayside
In order to remedy this, I've decided that every Saturday I'm going to go either hiking or for a long bike ride. I honestly think, that if I have this deadline in my head of something to look forward to, I'm going to be more motivated to get stuff done during the week and the weeks won't just pass by to infinity with no memorable distinction between them. I've already started this past Saturday by going up Ford Mountain in Chilliwack. I was originially going to go with a friend, but something came up and she couldn't make it. I've missed out on so many hikes for this very reason, and I've decided it's a silly one that will be deactivated immediately. So, I went on the two hour drive and hike alone and it was wonderful :-)
Another activity I greatly enjoy and don't do enough of is write about stuff here. So, I hope to do that on a more regular basis and not let it be forever bumped to the back of my to do list.
In order to remedy this, I've decided that every Saturday I'm going to go either hiking or for a long bike ride. I honestly think, that if I have this deadline in my head of something to look forward to, I'm going to be more motivated to get stuff done during the week and the weeks won't just pass by to infinity with no memorable distinction between them. I've already started this past Saturday by going up Ford Mountain in Chilliwack. I was originially going to go with a friend, but something came up and she couldn't make it. I've missed out on so many hikes for this very reason, and I've decided it's a silly one that will be deactivated immediately. So, I went on the two hour drive and hike alone and it was wonderful :-)
Another activity I greatly enjoy and don't do enough of is write about stuff here. So, I hope to do that on a more regular basis and not let it be forever bumped to the back of my to do list.
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